- I get uncomfortable when my stuff starts to accumulate: if I perceive
too many books, CDs, whatever; I have a refining purge (this in contrast
to the rest of my pack-rat family)
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- I think men who wear plaid trousers and women in stirrup
or Capri pants look ridiculous
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- Don't chew gum around me, I may get violent. However,
smoke 'em if you got 'em. (If you must)
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- I was hit in the head with a baseball bat at the beach one summer - I
blundered over the plate when some guy was swinging at the pitch. This
was when I was about 7. A year earlier I fell out of a tree I was hanging
upside down off the branch of, right onto my head (only a couple feet, but still)
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- I have never eaten a Big Mac
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- I've worn glasses since the third grade. My perscription's now almost -10 (ie,
extremely nearsighted). Between ages 33 and 39 I wore contacts during the day,
but I stopped doing that a few years back and now wear my glasses (John Lennon-style
wire-rims) unless I'm feeling incredibly vain, or I'll be a few hours in real
bright sunlight so I want to wear my wraparound Ray-Bans
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- I know how to tie a bow tie, and I know how to operate a slide rule
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- I can't stand radios or TVs on "in the background" unless they're just playing
music. If it's people talking (or worse, ads) I'm compelled to TURN IT OFF. This
gets me into trouble at the gym, and in stores and certain restaurants
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- A girl first kissed me when I was 12, but I didn't kiss a girl until I
was 16
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- Shaving: Yes.
Just don't like the partial look - either a full
beard or a clean face, there is no in-between.
The Worst is the little stubble on the chin.
Not even the mustachio is allowed: U used to
say only cops and faggots had mustaches, a list
I'd append with Arabs and Hispanics.
Whenever I've tried to grow any facial hair the
"itchies" have driven me back to the razor before
the appearance of any substantial growth - and I'm
tempted now to do my whole head, ie the back, too.
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- I wanted to get married when I was younger, but that urge faded in my 30s
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- I take a bath every night it's possible. Showers at the gym after my morning workout,
of course; but I need my relaxing evening bath, too. I consider the American habit
of showering in the morning perverse - I mean, you crawl into bed wearing the day's
filthy coating you've accumulated?
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- I've flown in a blimp (but only once)
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- I consider eating lunch at my desk punishment (you mean, no recess today?) I can't
understand the people I see rushing back from fast-food joints with their styrofoam
clamshells - what's the rush? What are you going to miss in the ten
minutes it would take to polish off that burger? And during the drive back, it's
gotten cold - yechhh!
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- I get headaches every few days - sometimes almost daily. Usually they go away by
bed-time
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- When I was in elementary school it seems like every one of my teachers got
really frustrated at some point and roared "This is the worst class I've ever had!"
Some of my middle school teachers also did this
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- I've visited all 50 states and many foreign countries, but I've never been to
New Orleans. (Somebody once told me it's the only town where Skid Row is the main
attraction - but I haven't avoided it for that or any other reason). I haven't yet
been out of the Northern Hemisphere (or even north of 65°), nor have I been anywhere between east
longitudes 25° - 115°
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- I detest raw onions - biting into one is a feeling akin to chewing
on a live electrical wire
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- I think anyone with a car alarm should be terminated with dispatch (or at least
their vehicle)
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- I used to like raw cookie dough when I was a child, but now I insist that
all my cookies, bread, pizza crust, toast etc be baked 'till they're crispy
and golden brown - to some, this equals "burned" (but that's not the case,
burned = black & charred)
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- I think tatoos and piercings are really gross. Same goes for
lipstick, eyeshadow, and fingernail polish in unnatural colors
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- I don't wear a watch - there's always a clock nearby
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- I was in the fourth grade when JFK was shot - to avoid trouble, they
didn't tell us in school - I heard about it on the bus-ride home (some kid had a
transistor). I watched the Challenger explode live, on the big screen in
one of the main mission control rooms at the Goddard Space Flight Center
(my tracking system continued plotting the position & velocity of its debris)
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- I don't like living with hardwood floors - wall-to-wall carpeting
is a must.
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- Professor Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker are my favorite Muppets
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- Although I like some dogs, I'm more of a cat person. Barking
dogs have bugged me so much that I think it's fitting when
urban dog owners are forced to handle their animals' feces daily,
protected only by a used plastic shopping bag
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- I ran the LA Marathon in 1993
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- I could easily beat Urkel to within an inch of his life (but why
single him out? I'd do the same favor to any number of TV people
with relish)
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- I have asthma now, although I don't know that I'm allergic to
anything, except air pollution. Also, I sneeze a lot, and I enjoy
a good sneeze - but people who're compelled to mark each with a
"Bless You" really get annoying - I mean, what's their deal? They
think they're the Pope or something?
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- My brothers all made Eagle Scout, but I (the family black sheep) only made it to Life.
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- I have been to a Jimi Hendrix concert. I never saw the Beatles, but
I've seen the Stones twice - it was already too late, they sucked both
times (early 70's). I also saw the Who twice (before Keith Moon died) and
Pink Floyd twice (before Roger Waters quit) and they were great!
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- I took LSD before I ever got drunk
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- The first time I ever compiled a program was in 1972, when I submitted a
deck of punch-cards to a Univac 1108/1106.
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- A window over my kitchen sink is a component of my true
happiness (I'd also like one in the bathroom, please)
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- I don't buy Exxon gas; haven't since their drunken sea captain did that to Alaska
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- I still have my tonsils and three of my wisdom teeth, but my
appendix was removed when I was 8 years old
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- I think the desire to go into politics or join the police indicates
a dangerous personality disorder / mental illness (and people who have
it should not be allowed to go into politics or join the police)
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